Christmas frenzy is at a peak here in the UK so I thought it would be perfect timing to talk about surviving the holiday season. This time of year is a time for gratitude for all that we have, the flipside of this being that it is also a time when it is especially difficult not to grieve for that which we do not. Five years ago I wrote about my experiences of three Christmases with no pregnancy and no baby. I used to adore this season but it turned into something I dreaded.
4 years ago I fell pregnant following IVF in the spring so our baby would have been due early January. I had envisioned a quiet Christmas at home waiting for our baby’s arrival and the possibility that he/she may arrive on Christmas Day! When I miscarried my thoughts immediately turned to the fact that Christmas would be extremely difficult.
We put plans in place to prepare for what inevitably could be an emotional time. I say could be as with my mindfulness and other mindbody practices I know not to expect to feel any particular way just to be prepared.
I created a ‘Coping at Christmas’ bundle for you sharing the techniques that I find indispensable. This holiday package includes an hours worth of videos, a 19 page ebook and 2 meditations.
Coping at Christmas
Learn techniques to survive and thrive during the holiday season. I will be teaching a range of mindfulness, cognitive behavioural, emotional freedom and positive psychology techniques.
1. The Christmas we should be having
It is very easy while trying to conceive to feel that infertility has stolen Christmas. I used to adore this season but years of trying to conceive took its toll and it became something I dreaded, a time when it’s really difficult not to think about how you had expected your life to turn out. By now I thought I would have two children, be living in the countryside in a house large enough to accommodate a 6 foot Christmas tree and seat eight people for Christmas dinner! I will be teaching techniques to help you cope with the fact that this Christmas probably isn’t going to look like what you wanted it to look like. This will include coping with the grief of lost babies.
2. Awkward questions
We have all experienced that awkward silence after an aunt or well-meaning friend tells us to hurry up and have a baby before it is too late. I will share some fantastic comeback replies ranging from the softly softly to the whack them round the face with a sprig of holly response! Suitable for all levels of inappropriate comments.
3. Combating overwhelm
Christmas is intense, the shopping, the preparation, the expectations, spending extended time with family, all the while having to look like you are really enjoying it. Having a few tricks up your sleeve to keep yourself feeling sane and balanced is essential.
4. Emotional Freedom Techniques
We will be doing some EFT tapping on the subjects of not looking forward to Christmas and coping with jealousy. I will also teach you hand tapping a quick version of EFT which you can use to bring your body out of stress response and into relaxation and the beautiful heart anchor technique to allow you to focus on love and gratitude and enhance these feelings in your life.
Support throughout the holidays
Do join our free Embrace Fertility support group to connect to others and support one another during the holiday season.
Over to you
What strategies are you putting in place for coping at Christmas while trying to conceive? Leave a comment below, or come join the conversation within our free online support community.
